Friday, 27 May 2016

Breaking the Silence

I just finished reading Volume 1 of L.M. Montgomery’s personal journals. She wrote in journals up until her death and volume 1, which covers 1889 – 1910 has been a delightful trip into the thoughts and actions of one of my favourite authors. (As an aside, I have always loved that Montgomery, Alcott & I share the first two initials).

I often find myself dissatisfied when reading biographies of my favourite celebrities. Their lives are, I suppose, too human, and contain that level of sorrow or poor morals or what-have-you. It always leaves me feeling a bit let down, to see the flaws in the lives of those I admire, or at least whose art I admire (for often after finishing a biography I no longer admire the person). Reading Montgomery’s journals, however, has had the opposite effect. She had horrible struggles with depression but somehow hearing it in her own words, walking that path with her rather than having it throw at me by a biographer, has made quite a difference and only increased my admiration for her, rather than leaving me with the let down feeling that someone who brought so much joy to the world through her writings could suffer so terribly (need I say I was *not* a fan of the biography I read of her?). It also gave me a good insight to the intensity of “Emily’s Quest”.

Reading her journals at this point in time has been like finding a kindred spirit, particularly when I saw the infrequency of her writing as she took on more adult responsibilities into her thirties. They’ve been a good kick in the pants to get back onto blogging, and journaling, for even my favourite author wrote infrequently but steadily!

In usual form I’m sure I’ll go back in the following months and finish writing up all the things I’ve missed. I’ve also got a ten-mile-long list of embroidery projects, a giant backlog of gifts for babies and weddings and what-have-you. To all my friends who read this – I’M SORRY! But I keep trusting that a personalised gift is worth the wait, even if your babies are toddlers by the time I’m done.

In regards to the every day... I absolutely love my job and I’m so thankful I took a risk last March and applied for it. I’m constantly being challenged, which is an environment I thrive in, and I find the work really engaging. David’s been working very steadily on projects all year which means we’re living in a crazy cycle where one of us is always working while the other one is watching the kids/running the house, which is incredibly exhausting, but I am so proud of the work he’s doing. It always takes so long from when he finishes a project to when it gets published but in fun news a book he wrote a chapter for last year has finally come out in print and our copy should be arriving shortly.

On a larger scale, however, 2016 has been a sad year for us. This is, I think, one of the reasons I’ve not been writing as much. Since January we’ve either had family members pass away OR had close friends/family undergo personal tragedies and loss ever month and this has been emotionally exhausting. 

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