Kindergarten: 5 Weeks In

The children have been in Chinese Kindergarten for a month now. Schooling has, of course, been a hot topic under our roof, and really this should be no surprise. If my reading of literature and biography has taught me anything it’s that how, when, and where to school your children has been a subject of discussion and worrying for centuries. I find some comfort in adding my woes to the sum total of human experience.

 

First day of school. It's 6am or something ridiculous like that. 

The initial going was hardest on little Emily. She has had a hard year, having gone from having her daddy at home with her every day to having that same daddy working the long hours that come with Academic territory. And, since our flat is of modest size, it is generally best for all of us if most of those long hours take place at his office. It’s not far away but it’s not at home and for Annie that makes all the difference. To then find that she is no longer to be at home every day with the security of Mama and brother was a cold dose. But she has now made friends at school, English-speaking friends, and she occasionally has a recess with Walter, and she generally basks in a warm glow of knowing that her teachers find her smart and adorable and her friends find her kind and fun. 

Recess

September homework assignment: build a house

With Walter it is harder to tell. He tends to be a bit of a loner by choice, preferring only the company of those who can come up with better games than his own or those who are willing to fall under his instruction. He tends to be frustrated with any interference in his plans and his main complaint is that the other children won’t leave him or his setups alone. He doesn’t mind going to school and he has been learning to write numbers, letters, and characters, but it is hard to say if he enjoys it or if he just does it as his duty, a box to tick off before he can go home and get back to the real business of infrastructure, engineering, and dinosaur battles. I do know that he heartily enjoys the sports days, for he is stronger and faster than most, if not all, of the kids in his class and he loves to run and to win. So while he may have his focus mostly on his own projects, rather than what his peers are doing, it seems that his natural athletic talent will help him from becoming too isolated as he tends to be in demand for sporty things. 

One of Walter's at-school projects in the lead up to National Day/Golden Week

September homework assignment: make a traditional Chinese opera mask

School is doing what we’d hoped – teaching the children practical skills like buttoning buttons and putting on socks, giving them a taste of independent interaction, and letting them have a safe space to learn how to listen to authority. Their little brains are soaking in Chinese, even if they don’t realize it, which was one of our goals in enrolling them at the Chinese Kindergarten rather than an international one. Our family interests of art, music, and literature are covered off in our usual way, by going on outings and talking with the children. In our spare time at home we are teaching them to read and write English, and by helping them with their little homework assignments I am learning a wee bit of Chinese.

Third Sunday of Advent (in which I seem to suck at all the things)

By the  end of the Third Sunday of Advent we were totally failing at Mass-going this season. It is not quite as bad as last winter, I think, but between the downpours (and no car!), the growth-spurt tantrums (I'm guessing it's a thing?), and the never-ending lack of sleep it seems that we're meeting an epic fail despite the number of Mass times available to us in this metropolis. So that's a disappointment but it's also life with two toddlers.

As for the novena, totally sucking at that also. But in good news, I've managed to get the Advent candles lit on Sunday each week so that's quite an improvement over previous years. Small steps, my friends, small steps.

All that said, last Tuesday (December 8th) was the Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception (Holy Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to Thee). In most places it's a Holy Day of Obligation for Catholics, meaning that they're supposed to treat it as importantly as a Sunday and get to Mass. In Canada things are very lax so there's no obligation. But I try not to let that stop me, especially now that I've discovered a 7:15 Mass at the Cathedral downtown. I can get there and back to my work shuttle on one bus ticket and it doesn't even make me late for work. So off I went to enjoy a peaceful and quiet Mass. Of course nothing seems to come easy lately so my fancy new umbrella with its auto-open-auto-close feature broke and wouldn't close, no matter how much button pushing, force, or cursing was directed to it. And it was downpouring. To say I was in a bit of a fluster would be putting it mildly. But it didn't matter, because there was something soul-deeply-calming about being in a candle-dim church, listening to the sounds of the rain and the voices praying, feeling like I was being held close in Mary's heart. It's totally worth the 6am wakeup time to go.

In order to try and give a nod to the feast day at home, I went for a white-themed meal (to symbolize purity). We had a thai chicken-coconut soup, garlic bread, and lemon snow bars. It was a lot of fun.

I spent the rest of the week trying to gear up in order to survive the weekend. Walter has his Ukrainian dance class every Saturday at 9:30am in downtown Vancouver, which means that we leave the house at 8:30am, which means that IF no children wake up early I get to sleep in by about 10 minutes compared to my normal wake-up time. And this week was even more hectic, because I was taking Annie along with us AND it was dress rehearsal day AND all the adults were corralled to help set up the hall for Sunday's recital. But I survived and thanks to the magic of crayons the children behaved during the setup and Annie even made friends with a baby at the class.

Later that afternoon my brother came over to help make Christmas shortbread. He is much less edgy with the kids than I am when it comes to making stuff so it's always nice to have him around for kid participation time. It ended up being a tonne of fun! We made our batch of cookies, got them all suitably decorated, and I don't think that I yelled once. It probably helped that John brought a case of cola with him because man oh man was I running on sugary caffeine all weekend.

Then came Sunday. Not just any Sunday, but Gaudete Sunday. Gaudete is Latin for "rejoice!" and it's the day that we light the pink advent candle and the day in my house that we start hitting the Christmas festivities with the same hardcore zeal as the rest of our culture. Usually it's the day I put up the tree and really start indulging in my favourite Christmas albums. As a nod to all things seasonally liturgical, Annie & I wear pink and we all try to get in a very joyful mood. This year? Mostly epic fail.

The toddlers would! not! stop! screaming! So we changed our plans of going to a morning Mass at the Cathedral and opted to stay at home until Dance Recital time and then go to one of the three evening Masses we could easily do on our way home. And then a certain Sir threw an hour-long fit when his cruel parents tried to dress him before leaving the house. And then the sprinkling of rain turned into a downpour that ended as soon as we reached the stage in our journey that no longer required being exposed to the rain. And my poor sick husband got soaked to the bone, and is subsequently much sicker now, and the toddlers would! not! stop! screaming!

We did make it through the Dance Recital with a minimum of upset. I count it as a success that I got Walter into his costume, sans hat (he was supposed to be a magical mushroom from Baba Yaga's forest), because he was mostly adamant that he'd wear it "tomorrow". The recital itself was great fun, because Ukrainians are AWESOME. From the minute the music started the hall was full of stamping feet and clapping hands and good, positive energy. After the recital there was a sa potluck, carol singing, and a visit from Grandfather Frost (who had a present for each child).

The journey home was less successful, as the crying ramped up again (thank you, Baby Annie) and we ended up missing Mass again because of the screaming and crying and general inability of Certain Small Humans to cope with social situations. The children mostly misbehaved until bedtime, the Advent candle didn't get lit until well after they were tucked away, I didn't find the third Sunday of Advent prayer, and it was not the joyful Sunday I'd been hoping for. So I ranted and raved and added to the general misery of the household. And then I ordered Chinese food and put my feet up and remembered that tomorrow is another day.

Walter's Second Birthday (only 5 months late...but I started writing it in August!)

My darling Walter,

Today you are two years old! Time has certainly flown and it is so disconcerting to see you acting more & more like a “big boy” and needing me less & less for the basics (like moving you from place to place or eating). You certainly know your own mind and are very quick to let people know that you mean business when you’ve expressed “mo” or “yeah”.

Every day with you is a delight and parenting you is becoming less of a mystery now that you can communicate a little better. You are most definitely Mommy’s Little Man and we usually spend an hour or more snuggled together, reading books, watching a show or taking a nap. You really get drawn into your playtime and love lining up & parking all of your trucks (arrrrrrrrrrrrrr), trains (eeeeeeeeeeeee), and cars (spee bars). Your sister drives you mental because she makes constant chaos of your ordered world, but you are very loving to her when you relax enough to stop worrying about what she’s going to destroy next.

You love going to Mass and identify anything related to it as a “Jeezaba”. You usually sit on Daddy and act like a perfect little gentleman. You’ve learned to say “alleluia” so we try to get you to follow along, but mostly you prefer to soak it all in and occasionally stack the hymnbooks.

Ash Wednesday, 2014

Trains are your absolute favourite thing. You’ve been riding on them since you were seven weeks old and you are becoming a fast collector of all things train-related. I loved surprising you with a Thomas the Tank Engine birthday party because you were so excited with all the train decorations that Uncle Johnny had designed for you. You were a good little host and your guests had a wonderful time.

After your ride on the Stanley Park Miniature Train in July -- You were reluctant to leave!

You’ve been hitting or surpassing all of your milestones. Lately your talking has really taken off and it’s fun listening to you come out with your own thoughts & phrases, instead of just mimicking what we try to get you to say. You love to play jokes on us & can always be counted on for a good laugh.

You are a little shy of strangers & no one can make you be friendly to anyone you don’t want to be around, although we’re working on acceptable ways of communicating that. Once you get to know people, however, you are a friendly & constant companion.

Two years ago, you crashed into my world and you’ve had me racing to catch up with you ever since. I treasure so many memories with you, like our special time together sightseeing in Berlin or the “Mummy & Walter” time we share when ‘Baby Annie’ is taking a nap. Daddy calls you a special little boy & he is 100% accurate in that!

Lovingly,
Mama

Zero

One

Two

 

 

 And a few shots from Walter's Thomas the Tank Engine Birthday Party:

Walter's Baby Schedule

In doing some computer-house-cleaning, I found the very detailed schedule of Walter's day that I typed out for David last year, in anticipation of my return to work. Needless to say it was a lot more detailed than David needed, and the two of them came up with their own way of doing things, but I want to keep a record of it as it reminds me of Walter's baby days.

Walter’s Normal Schedule

On a good day, I try to keep Walter as close to this schedule as possible. The times are approximate, as they depend on when he wakes up and what sort of mood he’s in. He is fairly flexible so if you need to head out with him for any reason he can adapt to the day:

8am: Walter wakes up “for good”. He likes to sit up and tell you about his sleep. He’s usually in a really good mood, unless he’s woken up crying because he’s wet himself. The first thing to do when he is ready is to change his diaper. If necessary you can put him into clean jammies.

8:30/9: Once Walter is changed, I like to give him breakfast right away. For breakfast he has cereal with fruit (you just add water and stir it to a consistency that he’ll take). He wears a bib and I try to get him to eat the whole bowl. I have breakfast at the same time. When we’re both done eating, or if Walter finishes first and is really fussy, I wash his hands, face, & highchair tray with a warm damp cloth. Then I put the bib aside for his next meal, rinse out his bowl & his spoon, and release him from his chair.

9-10: After breakfast we try to have playtime. I encourage him to entertain himself and I usually take this as an opportunity to read. He hates being left on his own, so if I have to leave the room I usually put a show on that he likes so that he can watch it when he gets bored of his toys.

10-12: Usually within 2 hours of waking up, Walter is cranky, rubbing his eyes, and ready for his morning nap. He likes to drink a bottle (pause halfway through to burp him, and then once again when he finishes) as he goes to sleep. He sleeps on his tummy, in his crib, with a light blanket covering him. He likes to be rocked to sleep while being sung to, and I usually wait until he’s dead asleep before trying to put him down in his bed.

Once he’s asleep it’s the ideal time to get things done, so it’s worth the effort it takes to get him to fall into a deep sleep. He’ll usually nap for 1-2 hours, although sometimes he goes a bit longer (it’s best not to let him nap for more than 3 hours at a time during the day unless he’s had a really bad night).

12: Walter will usually let you know when he’s awake, but it’s up to you at what point in the process you want to pick him up. Sometimes he wakes up and plays happily with toys in his crib, in which case you can leave him be (he’ll want to come out of bed as soon as he sees you), and other times he wakes up shouting/crying and demanding instant attention.

If he’s crying a lot and didn’t finish his bottle before bed, I sometimes give him the rest of his milk to drink. Otherwise I just change his diaper straight away. This is the time that I put him into his “big boy clothes”. He can wear any daytime outfit of your choosing – just remember to put socks on him! I use this as an opportunity to get dressed if I haven’t managed it thus far. If by some miracle his jammies are still clean, they can be put aside for the evening.

12:30: Now it’s lunch time. For lunch I like him to try some grownup food. He doesn’t always like to eat a lot at lunch time. I try to have my lunch either with him or shortly after he does. Same routine as the morning in cleaning him up after eating.

1-2 or 3: This is Walter’s second playtime. Same as the morning. This is usually a good opportunity to take him out for fresh air or to run any errands/get out of the house, as he’ll have already had one good sleep in the day.

2/3 – 4/5: Around 2 hours after he wakes up, although sometimes closer to three hours, he’s ready for his afternoon nap. Again with the crankiness & eye rubbing. Same as before with milk, songs, rocking, and on his tummy to sleep. I usually use this nap to get things done and make sure dinner is prepped.

4/5: Walter may only nap for an hour, or you may get lucky and he’ll stretch it to two. Once he’s awake I change his diaper and, if he’s soiled his daytime clothing, he goes back into jammies. He can use this time to finish any milk that he has left from before his nap, or he may want a fresh bottle made up.

Late Afternoon/Early Evening: His routine at this time of day is a lot more flexible, since it depends on what time the adults are having supper and if there are any plans for the evening. If it’s early & light out, it’s sometimes a nice time to take him out for a walk if you didn’t get out earlier in the day, especially as you don’t need to be home until bedtime. Other than that he can play, drink milk, and harass you as he sees fit.

Sometimes he will start vigorously rubbing his eyes and acting incredibly cranky. He often likes to take a 30-60 minute ‘cat nap’ in the evening. He is allowed to do this any time before 7pm, and if he does sleep then he needs to wake up by 7:30pm.

Around grownup suppertime is when he has his last solid meal of the day – right now he eats rice cereal, because he needs to have something plain & easy to digest, but as he gets better with solids this will change to more of what we’re eating.

If the evening’s activities are done early, then I like to give him a bath around 7 or 7:30 to help him stay awake & relaxed until bedtime.

8/9: It is very important that he heads to bed no earlier than 8 and no later than 9. I change him into his special night time diaper (pampers baby dry), make sure his jammies are relatively clean, and put him into his sleeping-bag. Then I turn the lights off and give him his bottle while we say prayers. Then follows the drinking/rocking to sleep. For night he goes to sleep on his back.

Ideally, he’ll sleep for 11-12 hours after going to bed, maybe only waking up at 5am for a drink of milk. In reality he might wake up every 3-5 hours, until he is up for good the next morning (around 11 or 12 hours after he goes down to bed), and then you get to do the whole thing all over again!

18 Months of Walter

Even at 18 months, it was hard for me to think of Baby Walter as a baby. And it’s always been that way, which is how I suppose it usually is for us eldest children, because we are always the ones surprising our parents with how much we can do at such a young age. I’m less surprised when Emily does stuff, unless it’s super early, because that’s what she *should* be doing at that age.

It doesn’t help that Walter is so tall. By 18 months he was ready for 24m/2T sized clothes. He’d been walking for more than half a year and is really sturdy on his feet, and he’s never had a really ‘baby’ look so he looks like a short toddler rather than a tall baby as he charges around.

I’ve chucked all the baby websites & books out and only tend to reference them when I’m really stuck. It means I’m not that up to speed on what milestones he should be hitting when. With all the moving around, I wanted to hold off on potty training until we were all a bit more adjusted. He went through a screaming phase, which lasted for way too long, and that was in full swing by 18 months. So we introduced time-outs, to help him identify boundaries, and he is pretty quick to understand that “do you want a time-out” is his last chance to end his negative behavior.

packing himself for our trip to Canada

He’s really good at understanding instructions but not so great at using his words. He doesn’t use the same ones consistently, although he gains a new word every week or so. But, even if he’s not speaking much English (or Spanish), he’s babbling constantly and he’s always, always singing. And perhaps saying Mass – he loves to wander around, chanting, and solemnly handing out imaginary hosts (or something) to everyone in the room. And I think he says little homilies, because sometimes he’ll get a very serious look on his face and let loose a volley of Walter-babble, only to stop & laugh & ensure we’ve all be listening. Then he goes on with chanting & hanging stuff out.

he still loves reading Daddy's books

He’s developed an attachment to his blue blanket, and Blanket has to accompany him to every nap & for long car journeys. He likes to have a variety of ‘stuffies’ in his crib, especially Oscar (a monkey) & Paddington Bear. He will turn almost anything into a toy, but in particular he favours trucks & trains & computers. Trains are his absolute favourite thing – he loves train spotting when we’re out and Thomas & Friends is constant TV demand.

train selfie!

His teeth stopped coming in once winter hit, so that brought him to a grand total of 12 by 18 months. He’s toddler-weird with foods. Toast with peanut butter & jam is his mainstay, along with milk, although he is usually quite fond of fruit, bread, beans, cheerios & eggs. He loves a “full English” and will happily devour his own breakfast and the breakfasts of those around him. He is a chocolate monster but will turn his nose up at most other sweets.

He’s usually pretty great about going down for naps & bed, but he’s not a long sleeper (most of the time) and he tends to favour early mornings, which is a bit rough as Emily likes late nights. I’ve always preferred the early morning time of day, even if I can’t usually get myself up without Walter’s siren song, and so we try to make that our special time together.

Walter is everyone’s Little Buddy. He is friendly, kind, & very affectionate. He has a real sense for adventure and loves to be out & about, exploring new places with his family. He has added so much richness to our lives and we are so thankful for our little man.

 

English Christmas (in England!), 2013

So... Christmas! Or, as I’ve been calling it in my head, The Year We Wanted to Go Home but Couldn’t So I tried Extra Hard to Make things Nice. David tells me that I succeeded, which is great because it means my title isn’t a total waste of brain space.

This was our fourth English Christmas, but it did not contain the following things which I’ve associated with English Christmas: Clare College Advent Service, Clare College Christmas Formal, M.R. James’ Ghost Stories at the Leper Chapel, Christmas Dinner with my work team, and Christmas week hijinks at the office. All of these things were missed but most of them would’ve been impossible with the two babies anyway.

For something completely new, we got to attend the Ely Lights Switch-On. That should be fairly self explanatory. Market Square was absolutely packed with stalls and people, there was a big stage where various performers blared bad music (we are so not down with what kids these days are listening to), and the air was full of Christmas cheer. We shared a bag of roasted chestnuts, with Walter joining in on the action, and eventually fought our way to a nice bit of ground to await the countdown. Then the city lit up with Christmas lights and it was beautiful and magical and actually really special to feel part of the community.

Eating his chestnuts

 

Their Santa Hats from Baba arrived that evening

Our Christmas Pudding!

David really wanted an Advent Wreath, so on the first Sunday of Advent we walked home via the fens and gathered some winter greenery which I then wove into a wreath. I’m so glad that we did this, because it’s one of the first Catholic things we’ve done that Walter has shown interest in. He wanted the candles lit every evening, with supper, and he’d remind me to use the prayer book if I forgot. We caught him trying to cross himself a couple of times as well.

We once again did the tree decorating on the Gaudete Sunday week of Advent. This year Walter was old enough to help, which mostly consisted of him appropriating the Christmas tree box as his new most favourite toy. To save money I handmade most of the decorations and it actually turned out better than I thought. In England people like to hang bright, foil-wrapped chocolates on their trees so we went that route because it made more sense to pay for edible decorations than for ones we’d toss out.

Ended the evening with Christmas baking, of course!

Instead of supper out, we had our pub outing for lunch on Christmas Eve. Then we made ourselves brave and woke the sleeping babies in time for the 11:30pm Carol Service at our church, followed by Midnight Mass. It was funny being out in the middle of the night with the double buggy, all of us dressed respectably for church, and walking past the long bar lineups and the police vans in downtown Ely. When we got home it seemed that Santa had dropped off a couple small packages for the children, although Walter was mostly interested in stacking them and Emily had no idea why we wanted her to rip paper.

We all got to bed at around 2am, but at least the kids didn’t want to wake up until closer to 9. And they’re too little to understand about presents and Christmas morning, so we were able to take things at our leisure. It was a lovely day, with lots of talking to family, and relaxing, and no heavy cooking. Both kids were a bit out of sorts, wanting long naps, so it meant that David and I had a fairly easy time of it once we got them to sleep. Our special gifts for them this year were ikons from the Ely Cathedral Shop: St George & the Dragon for Walter and the Old Testament Trinity for Emily. We wanted them to have something that they could keep for years to come, especially as they are too little to know that we are short changing them on the toy front!

Trying to eat his new cutlery set

 

We saved our big Christmas dinner for Boxing Day, because cooking a big meal for the whole family with two kids is an epic undertaking. The cooking was mostly stress-free and we ended up enjoying a lovely meal together, right before Walter's bedtime.

Hallowe'en / Bonfire Night

I got relatively caught up on “life blogging” only to lose track again. That’ll teach me. Anyway, I forgot to write about Hallowe’en, which is silly because it’s one of my favourite holidays, and in England we get to stretch the celebration all the way out to Bonfire Night (which should be on November 5th, Guy Fawkes Day, but is always stretched to the weekend following).

Right. Hallowe’en. Hallowe’en in England is not the big thing it is in North America. There seems to be some custom where you take the kids to the houses with the lit jack-o-lanterns if you want to guarantee candy. As I’m not really versed in this custom, and as the kids are too little to be allowed candy (yes, I’m that mean mum who tries to keep control over their sugar intake), we thought we’d give costumes & trick-or-treating a pass yet again. Yes, I long for the day when I can dress the children up in costumes, but it seemed more prudent to stay in and have our own celebration.

We did get Walter a little pumpkin to carve. It was one of those silly things where he won’t remember doing it and we didn’t use it, aside from lighting it on Hallowe’en, but it was good family fun anyway. Walter was interested in the whole process, he didn’t eat the pumpkin seeds, and he gave it many benevolent smiles from his highchair (the finished product being perched in the middle of our table).

lid on, lid off

On Hallowe’en Day we ended up having to make a trip to Cambridge, as David’s University Library card was expiring and, given his odd status as a non-student-non-alumnus (because he’s submitted his thesis but hasn’t graduated) it was necessary to speak to a Librarian in person about how best to renew his card. The kids & I went on an epic adventure to buy some shoes for Walter (and thanks to St Anthony found a super pair of Clarks for 50% off and Emily’s Christmas dress at Marks & Spencer for only £3 – trust me, it’s not that trivial to ask St Anthony for shoe finding help, as I’d been trying for months to find something Walter could walk in and we were getting desperate). On our way home we decided to drop into Fitzbillies and pick up Hallowe’en themed pastries for afternoon tea: a fairy cake for me and a fondant toad for David. Delicious.

the frog got a bit bashed on the journey back -- makes it look my Hallowe'eny

Supper was one of my special treats – Pumpkin Stuffed with Everything Good (bread, cream, bacon, & cheese). The pumpkin, being one of the mass market carving ones, was lacklustre but the filling was delicious. We also had Hobgoblin beers & a dish of Hallowe’en candy.

David suggested we watch a spooky movie, so we settled on The Skeleton Key. There’s always a big debate in this house when it’s time for scary movies. I’m a huge fan of vampires, but not really of other monsters. I don’t like watching movies, or reading books, that have a heavy dose of supernatural evil in them. David doesn’t like watching movies about serial killers/mass murderers, even though this is my favourite kind of horror/thriller movie. So to find a movie that manages to strike the right balance is a bit of a challenge. Skeleton Key ended up being a great choice. It had a supernatural element, but it was one that I could handle (it’s movies about demonic possession etc that I really can’t watch). It was cheesy but also managed to be creepy. I’m still going over the plot a few months later, because I thought that the story was interesting even if the movie wasn’t worth watching again.

Once Hallowe’en was over it was time for the English to break out the Guy Fawkes traditions. David’s viva was on November 5th, so we had no trouble scoring a box of fireworks to set off in honour of his pass. When we went to the park to light them, we were able to watch the fireworks from elsewhere in the city. Walter loved watching the beautiful explosions and it was a really fun little expedition.

Ely was having a big charity fundraiser fireworks display on November 9th. We’d planned to go, but when I looked online that day I discovered that they were charging £8 for a family entrance fee (in Cambridge it was always “by donation”), and we don’t have money for those kinds of extras, especially as the kids are too little to really care. It worked out just as well – we were able to watch the whole display from Walter’s bedroom window. The fireworks exploded over Ely Cathedral and it was just gorgeous. Walter perched on his windowsill and had a great time watching the event. I think we got a better view than if we’d gone to the park.

we were heading to a wedding after the fireworks, hence the suit

2013 in 13

After finally catching up I am, once again, woefully behind on blogging. I still need to post about Hallowe’en, and Christmas, and all that other stuff. But the kids are being normal kids, instead of those ones that baby experts seem to base their books off of (dolls, maybe?), so sleep is short around here and time is shorter and and and...

And and and, it makes sense to cover off 2013 in a picture post! Because I can look for pictures with one hand while feeding Emily with the other. So here we go, and if you like the idea you should join the link up.

2013 in 13 Pictures

I love this picture, mostly because it makes my mum look like a hobbit. Also because the back story is literally a back story – she was having all sorts of weird pains with her back and neck and could barely move, but it didn’t stop her from trying to finish the kitchen renovations. Anyway, that’s not why I picked this. I picked it because the hominess of it sums up all the wonderfulness that is just being at home with a loving family. Even if the circumstances that brought me home weren’t ideal, it was wonderful being able to spend so much time with my family:

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This picture has been affectionately titled “Walter Needs a Visa”. The expression on his face pretty much sums up how I felt for most of last winter when I let myself dwell too much on the uncertainty facing our family. This is Walter’s visa picture, so it was taken when I at least knew where I was going, and that I had a job to go back to, and that we wouldn’t have to be away from David any longer. I knew the upcoming months would be difficult, but at least we’d be together:

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This is Easter, 2013. Walter & I were both horrendously sick with the ‘flu and couldn’t make it to the Easter Vigil, which broke my heart. We were also still in transition, not yet settled, and everything still seemed dark and dreary. So I sang. I sang the Exultet to Walter, to welcome in Easter Morning, and as I sang the dark cloud lifted and broke and I felt as if there was hope again. And miraculously enough, that was the day our flu cleared up:

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We moved to Ely, thus fulfilling my dream of living out in the English countryside. It’s been marvelous:

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David & Walter at the Eel Festival. Why? Because it was one of the first outings we had once we got settled in. But more than that, because it’s my little boy back with his daddy, having the time of his life. Two months apart was way too long:

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A bump! And at this point in time I was still hopeful that I would give birth “on time”. And I finally was looking pregnant. And the ultrasounds were looking good and the pregnancy was on track and it seemed that despite some worrying in the first trimester, Secunda was here to stay:

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Ely Folk Festival, which kicked off the start of my maternity leave. This family loves folk music. Being able to take Walter to his first festival and experience it with him was amazing. It was one of the highlights of the year, especially because it was so nice to just be doing fun things as a family again:

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Emily, less than two hours after birth. So thankful I had to be induced, because it kick started natural labour while I was at the hospital and I went from 4cm to Baby in about three hours, which would’ve been a nightmare if we’d been driving from Ely. And it was so nice to experience a normal birth and to have that special time where the three of us could get to know each other:

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My mum came to visit, for a month, and although most of that month was a blur of me being super exhausted and grouchy and way too pregnant, it was still lovely. She got to spend so much time with Walter and that is really special, especially since she was the first person he saw when he crashed into the world the previous August:

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Aside from Emily’s birth, this would have to be the highlight of the year – David completed & submitted his dissertation on time, and passed his viva, and very very soon I'll be able to sign myself "Dr & Mrs". I still cry when I think about the day we went, as a family, to submit his dissertation. To take all the blood, sweat, & tears, particularly of the last two years, and see that the sacrifices really did accomplish something... words fail:

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I got my nose pierced, after wanting one since I was a teenager. And I finally feel as if I look like myself and as if one more key to understanding my personality is visible:
 

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I turned thirty!

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Being able to celebrate Christmas in England with my England Babies. It was special to have our own Christmas this year, to introduce them to our little traditions, and to enjoy watching them experience the holiday:

2013 was a hard year. But it wasn’t as hard as 2012 and it at least brought us forward instead of keeping us in a horrible limbo. I don’t know what to expect from 2014. I’m nervous about this next stage of life, with everything so uncertain and unsettled, so I am trying to take it one day at a time. But I think we're going to be ok.